Honey, I am PREGNANTLY UNPREGNANT!
By B. Suryanarayanan
‘You seem fully pregnant.’
‘How many months?’
‘Oh, what am I even asking. With such a huge belly, you might be in your ninth month, ready to deliver facsimiles of you or your husband.’
‘Have you done the baby shower?’
‘No buts. You have to finish this soon; Else it is riskier to have one and going into labour.’
‘I am not married.’
‘Out of wedlock?’
‘Kids these days. Always in a rush to get things done. By the way, how many weeks of you-know-what?’
‘But I am not pregnant!’
She screamed at last, tears lacing the corners of her irises as she burst open the bubble they had caressed so clear. She had a boyfriend, had great sex, developed morning sickness out of the blue; Her boyfriend grew elated on getting pregnant together, all vim and whiskey-high till the stick screamed NEGATIVE.
His hopes were crashed, but he didn’t dump her. Instead, he continued their relationship, and used ‘safe-sex’ methodologies.
Months passed, and she gained weight just around the waist side, her morning sickness getting stronger with the passing time. She experienced everything a pregnant woman would- nausea, vomiting, dizziness, back cramps, etcetera.
Her belly grew as the months rolled, and she struggled to stand on her feet. Her neck ached; her clothes grew very bigger than her, and trips to the gym hardly changed things about her: The size of the belly remained the same.
She started passing out at her work place, falling unconscious repeatedly. Doctors turned it out to be simply some ‘gastric trouble’ without giving further thought and this irksome experience banged her hard for two whole years.
People started to stare at her, thinking she was having ‘nanotuplets’, ‘dozen babies’ and all that stuff.
Except, her pregnancy test was always negative.
Surprised? This was what I felt too when I read about this disease where the woman appears pregnant, but in reality, isn’t. They develop every form of gestational symptoms according to trimesters, except every time they make the choice to take the test, it comes out to be negative.
Well, it is simple. Many of us know about poly cystic ovarian syndrome, that also goes by its abbreviation PCOS where there are miniscule cysts inside the ovary that are many in number. There is no known cure or PCOS though it can be avoided either by surgery by removing the cysts, or by implementing healthy life style practices.
Now, imagine the cysts to be little kids of two or three years and assume you leave them on their own and go around to have your mummy’s time, with no one to care about them. They are all to themselves.
What do they do? Act like grown-ups, and make a mess of each other, letting us dawn upon regretfully as in on why we left them alone in the first place. You have to clean the garbage drawled behind, and when you finish it, you are thoroughly done and dusted, and vow to follow the phrase ‘prevention is better than cure’ more religiously the next time.
The same goes for cysts. If you leave them unattended, they start growing exaggeratingly in size, thus occupying the tract reserved for the foetus. As a result, when they grow in number, and weight, it gives the impression as if the person is pregnant, while spilling the dinkum oil, they are not.
The condition is extremely common, where fluid filled sacs occupy the ovary in huge number, and are usually harmless unless prompted to reach a point where they rupture.
These cysts, if left unattended, grow to transmogrify into cancerous tumours, and can put your very healths and dreams at risk.
There are many different types of cysts that get produced in an ovary, out of which follicular cysts and corpus luteum cysts are nor harmful at all and disappear in the same pace the barged into.
However, if you develop Endometriomas, Cystadenomas, and Dermoid cysts, then it is better to see a doctor.
Ovarian cysts can be caused by a lot of factors that include the likes of hormonal imbalance, endometriosis, severe pelvic infection, or infected intimidating previous cyst.
So, next time if you develop symptoms that facsimile the symptoms of pregnancy, but still, you end up with a negative test report in hand, do not forget to press your doctor to seriously consider your case and help you with it.
Because, prevention is indeed better than cure.
The case considered here was inspired by the story of Katie Holmes.