‘We Are Hardly Marriage’: Javed Akhtar Opens Up On His Relationship With Wife Shabana Azmi

Veteran writer and lyricist Javed Akhtar recently shared his candid thoughts on marriage and his long-standing relationship with actress Shabana Azmi, suggesting that the institution of marriage has become outdated and accumulated unnecessary baggage over the years.

In an interview with ‘Mojo Story’, Akhtar discussed the core of a successful relationship, emphasizing that mutual respect is essential. He stated, “The foundation of any relationship is mutual respect,” highlighting the importance of understanding and consideration over traditional labels.

Akhtar went on to challenge the conventional view of marriage, referring to it as a centuries-old tradition that has “collected a lot of moss, garbage, and muck” over time. “Shaadi-waadi toh bekaar kaam hai (Marriage is nonsense). It’s a stone that has been rolled down mountains for centuries, and as it was coming down the hill, it has collected a lot of moss,” he remarked. Akhtar further explained that his relationship with Shabana Azmi is based on friendship rather than the conventional definition of marriage. “Actually, we are hardly married. We are friends. My only qualification for a good marriage is this: are you friends or are you not?” he said.

Akhtar also discussed the evolving connotations of terms like “wife” and “husband,” which he believes have become loaded with expectations. Instead of focusing on these labels, he emphasized that the key to a successful relationship lies in mutual respect and personal space. “The words ‘wife’ and ‘husband’ have taken on so many different meanings. Just forget about it. Two people, irrespective of their gender, how can they live happily together? It needs mutual respect, it needs mutual consideration, it needs giving space to each other,” he added.

Drawing on his personal experience with Azmi, Akhtar pointed out that a relationship thrives when both partners can maintain their individuality and pursue their ambitions. “You have to understand that the other person is a human being, with their ambitions and dreams. They have just as much of a right over their ambitions as I have over mine. It isn’t rocket science. It’s quite simple,” he said.

Akhtar concluded by stressing that love without respect is fraudulent. He noted that an independent woman, with her ambitions and opinions, may not always be “convenient,” but is deserving of respect. “An independent woman, with her ambitions, her own business, her own opinion, is not a very convenient person. But you have to understand that they aren’t a slave.”

Javed Akhtar and Shabana Azmi, who married in 1984, continue to be one of Bollywood’s most respected couples, exemplifying the values of mutual respect and partnership in their relationship.