The number of women divorcing in their forties remains on the rise. Backing this up is data from the ONS revealing that both women and men with the highest divorce rates was between the ages of 45-49in 2017. So why is this the case? We reveal the key reasons behind why 40 is such a defining age for divorce.
Women Are More Financially Independent
Women today are much more likely to have their own career and/or access to their own finances. At 40+, they are more likely to have moved up the career ladder, or have enough experience to be able to earn a good salary. They know that even if they do separate legally from their spouse, they will still have the potential to make their own way financially. Although the challenges of reaching a financial settlement in your divorce may seem a barrier to initiating a separation, financial independence provides the confidence to make the break from an unhappy marriage.
The Impact Of Offspring
Having children can put a strain on any relationship. The financial pressures, the lack of time and overwhelming responsibilities can contribute to having less time and resources to commit to your relationship. Women may face the challenges of sleepless nights with young children, juggling the practicalities of school-aged children or managing teenage angst. Most mothers over 40 have spent years raising their children and over time, their marriage may have transformed into more of a business partnership.
You’re No Longer Compatible With Your Spouse
Life goals change from your 20s to your 40s. You and your spouse may have grown and adjusted together but sometimes it can be the opposite and you grow apart, staying married out of convenience. Later in life, you may want to begin exploring new hobbies and interests. This can lead to some partners distancing themselves more and wanting to spend more time experiencing the passions they’ve always wanted to.
Money Issues
Conflict in finances can cause huge rifts in marriages, and represent a difference of opinions and dreams which can push couples apart. Losing a job, dealing with debt, gambling or using money for control can lead to serious problems with the foundations of trust, communication and respect.
Adultery
Overtime and often due to ongoing conflict, the humdrum of life or work commitments, the attraction between two partners fades. This can lead to one party seeking love, attention, or physical affection outside of a marriage. Although affairs and infidelity can be worked through, it can spell the end for many marriages. One party may have decided to leave their spouse for a new relationship or the other may feel they can no longer trust their spouse.
Domestic Abuse
Although domestic abuse is not exclusive to women in their forties, it can be one of the reasons they ultimately divorce. Some women have experienced years of abuse from their partner before finally walking away. This abuse can take on several forms, including coercive control, emotional or physical or financial abuse. It can take some women until they are 40 to leave due to financial restraints or the realisation that their partner is unable or unwilling to change.
Getting Married Too Young
Statistically speaking, those who get married younger are more likely to get divorced. This can often happen at age 40+. Couples choose to marry after leaving school for many reasons, for example, acquiescing to family expectations, practicalities or traditions. These reasons do not always contribute to the foundation of a long-lasting marriage. As women age, they can realise that they did not have the chance to experience life alone, to be single or to travel. This can cause frustration and the desire to leave a partner as grasping all that life offers becomes ever-more appealing.