You are so lucky to have a lovely and a well mannered child.” These words from the friend’s mouth were no less than an award for Reshma. When a child receives compliments, parents consider it their achievement. Who does not want a child who is admired by all – a child who is most desired as a friend by other kids? Lovely and well-mannered kids are not born but proper parenting turns them into one.

_          Birthdays and anniversaries are the most special days in a person’s life, be it young or old. It is that person’s day, so teach your child to make a list of birthdays and anniversaries of all close people and not only wish them but make it special for them. It should not be buying an expensive gift for them but making a handmade card or writing a letter mentioning why the person is loved. Some craft or origami flowers made by the child along with chocolates can do wonders.

_          Teach your child to appreciate others’ talents, looks, good work or some achievement. People whether young or old like to get noticed. And your noticing gives them a boost. But the admiration should be genuine.

_          Make your child think big of his or her talent. If you notice some talent in your child enroll them in proper classes to give their talent a direction. Any form of liberal arts and sports develops many virtues in a child – like patience, endurance, accepting failure, managing success, creativity and hard work – which help to develop a good personality. Excellence in any form of liberal arts will also help at the time of stress and loneliness.

_          There are kids who do not greet their friends and elders when they meet them. This behaviour, though ignored by elders considering the child is young, looks very rude. Exchanging a few pleasant words or a simple ‘Hello’ or a smile with people whom you meet on a daily basis makes a real difference. Sorry, thank you, please, excuse me and pardon are golden words and should be used in your daily language. Good language and a sweet voice have an amazing impact on everyone.

_          Practically teach your child that good actions leave an impact on others. Like, offering your seat to a disabled, elderly, pregnant or ill person while travelling, sharing your toys or other items with friends, treating everyone with respect, holding the door open for the person behind you to enter, smiling, helping someone in their studies and during illness. Kaya sent all important class work via WhatsApp every day to Tiara when she was hospitalised. This act bonded Tiara and Kaya well and they became best friends.

_          Keep a simplistic and honest environment around your child. There are many virtues and behaviours that the child picks up from his or her parents. Be genuine in whatever you do. A true person is trustworthy and trust is the basis of all relationships. Teach your child not to be good to fulfill selfish motives or gain appreciation but make it a way of life.

_          Teach your child to care for others’ preferences before planning a game or a party or a gift. Like serving food of others’ choice when they arrange get together. Gift people items that are useful to them. Take note of the general mood while planning a game or activity. Be adjusting and not stubborn and egoistic.

_          Teach your child not to limit good work to certain sections of  society. You do not need to spend much time and money to help a needy. Your actions will replicate in your child. Encourage a poor child to attend school, try to stop child labour, cruelty against animals, various pollutions and addictions, say no to corruption and donate blood, books, clothes, medicines to some poor people whom you come across. Just look around and each day you will find someone who needs you. It is convenient to overlook people in need, around us. But a little effort from our side can bring smiles on many faces.

_          Never take away the child in the child as they grow. Teach your child to be natural and not put up a mask of artificial behaviour in front of others. Ahana was such a lovely and friendly girl that she took no time to make new friends and gain appreciation from others in her new school. She is still invited by her old school friends to their parties and they maintain regular contact with her as she is admired by all.

By Jyoti Galada